Team Fortress 2

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(come on! this is TF2! FIND THE JOKES !!)

What's Tea Eff Tooo ??

Basically the best godly multi FPS game EVER !

Legends are told about some god wearing nerd glasses and an orange suit, saying he fucked some female warrior with in another badass suit and had her pregnat with nine male childrens, all promised to be epic glorious badass warriors (except the Spy. Spy is a pussy).

Team Fortress was an official mod of the best solo FPS ever made. But it was lame. You played forgettable guys in orange suits fighting for capture points or flags and nothing special about it. Excepte there was already the awesome Engin (not as awesome as it is now) and the Puss-Spy.

Then, the awesome sequel HL2 came and, with it, the legendary Team Fortress 2 ! And it was already perfect, well balanced and well designed. Since, they added more awesomeness like sandvichs, hats and fucking war against robots !

In TF2, there's only war, sandviches and sentrys.

The game is essentially two teams fighting for...well... capture points and flags. But also pushing mine cart to blow up the enemy base. All of this being part of some litlle brunette's plan to take over the world.

During every match, you can choose to be one this nine classes;

Soldier: ka-boom, damage, can't run 'cause he's carrying a big-zooka.

Scout: he CAN run, like really really fast. Also can jump and throw balls at people. But low PV so, he dies easely.

Pyro; the class you play if you're a psycho dreaming of killing every people in school. Also, likes unicorns.

Demoman; the scottish black man that throws sticky bombs everywhere. Was created to annoy Engins because the pussy-spy could'nt get the job done !

Heavy; big russian guy that has tons of PV and ammo so you can waste them and see how long the left-button of your mouse can be pressed before it breaks. Basically, you're firing at everything and everywhere with a motherfucking minigun.

Engineer; the best class EVER made when you're using your intelligence and knowledge of the map to support your teamates because your such a generous human being that you'll put everyone's needs before your owns. And FUCK those guys saying we're afraid to go on battle ! We just KNOW that we're more effective behind ! Also, you're building awesome sentrys, healers/ammo dispensers and freaking teleportation devices so others don't have to run around the map to get to the front line. Are you awesome or are you awesome ??

Medic; the class you switch to when you see no one has. Can heal teamates and use a needle-launcher that does almost no damages. Will never be around when you need it and if you play it, everyone will call you a noob fucker 'cause you're not there when they need you. LIKE ITS SO EASY TO KEEP AN EYE ON EVERYONE !!!

Sniper; the class you forgot to play but you will hate when some of those skilled basterds will headshot you when you were about to finish that lvl3 sentry / capture that second point / finish that Spy you were stalking since he tried to stab you. Seems easy and safe but gets raped in close combat. People splaying snipers are generaly mutants-cyborgs being cloned and teached how ot aim by machines so they can be CIA agents when they become adults (but most of them escape CIA facilities and get a job at Subway so they can buy a PC and play TF2)

Spy: genuin gayraping assholes. Disguises themselves in order to get to sentrys and stab people in the back. Also, they eat babies and they created aids and cancer.