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| [[File:This-is-how-i-monk.jpg|400px|thumb|right|LOS TIBURON, THE SHARK OF THE LAND!]]
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| {{Awesome}}
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| This is a story by {{Anonymous|BROther Laughing Man|!!6Ltud83uedY}}. | | This is a story by {{Anonymous|BROther Laughing Man|!!6Ltud83uedY}}. |
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| Playing [[half-orc]] [[monk]]. Decided to play something beyond [[weeaboo]] 'i am master of martial arts.' Spent 100gp on an inlaid mask with intricate tribal designs sewn on the sides with a 'fin' on top. Thus I became '''LOS TIBURON''', THE SHARK OF THE LAND, MASKED WRESTLER. I took all my feats revolving around grappling. Grappled EVERYTHING. EVERY. FUCKING. THING. including, but not limited to, a [[bear]].
| | i am gay olololololololololololollololololololol |
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| Final part of the campaign: OH SHIT DRAGON. [[Dragon]] acts like a faggot, ducking into the water and popping out for breath weapon. Fuck that; I'mma charging its ass. My brother was playing a [[warforged]] [[fighter]] and assists my MIGHTY LEAP into the air, where I pose mid-air and shout about the HONOR OF THE MASK. That's how I TACKLED A FUCKING DRAGON. Dealt unarmed damage, latched on, and took a deep breath to prepare for the underwater struggle.
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| Dragon goes up. I forgot they can fly. DM gives me the option to let go before dragon takes off. Fuck that! I'm still wrestling! 200 FEET IN THE AIR, STILL WRESTLING A DRAGON AND DEALING UNARMED DAMAGE! Dragon actually starts hurting me; I need a plan. That's when brilliance strikes me:
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| "I roll to pin."
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| The entire table fell silent. I roll to 'pin' the dragon's wings behind its back, so it can't fly anymore. THE ENTIRE TABLE LEANS FORWARD TO WATCH THIS ROLL OF DESTINY. NATURAL. FUCKING. [[d20|TWENTY]]. I pin the dragon's wings, sending it and me hurtling into the ground. I have one combat round left to make my final statement.
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| "I AM LOS TIBURON! AND I... AM... A LUCHA!!!"
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| Dragon's neck snaps on impact. Through sheer luck or GM fiat -- possibly both -- I survive at -4 HP. The party cleric brings me back up to 1 HP, picks me up, and holds one arm into the air. My brother the fighter immediately bangs his shield twice, making the bell noise. Party's [[bard]]/diplomancer announces "And the winner is... Los Tiburon!"
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| And that's how I made it to level four.
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Revision as of 04:47, 25 January 2014
This is a story by BROther Laughing Man !!6Ltud83uedY.
i am gay olololololololololololollololololololol