Black Templars: Difference between revisions
1d4chan>12345combination No edit summary |
1d4chan>12345combination No edit summary |
||
| Line 2: | Line 2: | ||
[[Image:Praykillburn.jpg|800px]] | [[Image:Praykillburn.jpg|800px]] | ||
The Black Templars. These [[Space Marines|Spess Mahrehns]]. are as manly as the [[Manly Marines]] and as angry as the [[Angry Marines]]. But rather than express this [[Rage|fury]] through cursing or ordering 10,000 pizza to a rival chapter's fortess: they do so by burning [[Heresy| heretic texts]](as kindling for the actual heretics), pwning [[furry|muties]], and skull fucking aliens. But you say, "Isn't that what every other Spess Marine chapter does?" Well you'd be right, but unlike other chapters that are [[Raven Guard|lazy emos]] or [[Space Wolves|closet furfags]] these marines get shit done. They generally fly around on their battle barges [[Exterminatus|exterimatusing]] planets the [[Inquisition]] is to lazy fuck with itself or starting crusades against xenos [[Eldar|faggots]]. The Black Templars is the largest loyalist chapter with 3,000-10,000 Catholic Space Nazis in its ranks. This means that their chapter alone could wipe | The Black Templars. These [[Space Marines|Spess Mahrehns]]. are as manly as the [[Manly Marines]] and as angry as the [[Angry Marines]]. But rather than express this [[Rage|fury]] through cursing or ordering 10,000 pizza to a rival chapter's fortess: they do so by burning [[Heresy| heretic texts]](as kindling for the actual heretics), pwning [[furry|muties]], and skull fucking aliens. But you say, "Isn't that what every other Spess Marine chapter does?" Well you'd be right, but unlike other chapters that are [[Raven Guard|lazy emos]] or [[Space Wolves|closet furfags]] these marines get shit done. They generally fly around on their battle barges [[Exterminatus|exterimatusing]] planets the [[Inquisition]] is to lazy fuck with itself or starting crusades against xenos [[Eldar|faggots]]. The Black Templars is the largest loyalist chapter with 3,000-10,000 Catholic Space Nazis in its ranks. This means that their chapter alone could wipe out the [[Tau|weeaboo communists]] if they were drawn together in one place. Of course this would twist the nipples of the Inquistion and move the setting of 40k along, so don't expect it to happen anytime soon(read: ever). Their rage does have the side effect of making then unwilling to fight beside psykers(and giving them the option to make any enemy a prefered enemy on the table top, which if fucking awesome). They are desended from the [[Imperial Fists]], but obviously got Dorn's most manly [[Gene Seed|spooge]]. They sometimes get to wear cool crusader helms, but they aren't quiet as [[Awesome|awesome]] as the beakies' corvus helms. | ||
Revision as of 01:25, 21 June 2010
 This page is in need of cleanup. Srsly. It's a fucking mess. |
>
The Black Templars. These Spess Mahrehns. are as manly as the Manly Marines and as angry as the Angry Marines. But rather than express this fury through cursing or ordering 10,000 pizza to a rival chapter's fortess: they do so by burning heretic texts(as kindling for the actual heretics), pwning muties, and skull fucking aliens. But you say, "Isn't that what every other Spess Marine chapter does?" Well you'd be right, but unlike other chapters that are lazy emos or closet furfags these marines get shit done. They generally fly around on their battle barges exterimatusing planets the Inquisition is to lazy fuck with itself or starting crusades against xenos faggots. The Black Templars is the largest loyalist chapter with 3,000-10,000 Catholic Space Nazis in its ranks. This means that their chapter alone could wipe out the weeaboo communists if they were drawn together in one place. Of course this would twist the nipples of the Inquistion and move the setting of 40k along, so don't expect it to happen anytime soon(read: ever). Their rage does have the side effect of making then unwilling to fight beside psykers(and giving them the option to make any enemy a prefered enemy on the table top, which if fucking awesome). They are desended from the Imperial Fists, but obviously got Dorn's most manly spooge. They sometimes get to wear cool crusader helms, but they aren't quiet as awesome as the beakies' corvus helms.
Their accomplishments include:
Taking back a hundred planets that were stolen by the blue space socialists after the Smurfs ran home like little babies to deal with a single hive fleet.
Launching a 10,000 year crusade.
Killing an alien pysker and accidently blowing out ten billion astropaths in the process, oops.