Black Templars: Difference between revisions
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The Black Templars. These [[Space Marines|Spess Mahrehns]]. are as manly as the [[Manly Marines]] and as angry as the [[Angry Marines]], infact these guys would probably be the GW Canon version of the Angry Marines. | The Black Templars. These [[Space Marines|Spess Mahrehns]]. are as manly as the [[Manly Marines]] and as angry as the [[Angry Marines]], infact these guys would probably be the GW Canon version of the Angry Marines. | ||
==About the Black Templars== | |||
Eather than express this [[Rage|fury]] through cursing, ordering 10,000 pizza to a rival chapter's fortess or simply pounding the shit out of their opponents using a variety of power weapons: they do so by burning [[Heresy| heretic texts]](as kindling for the actual heretics), pwning [[furry|mutants]] and skull fucking aliens. But you say, "Isn't that what every other Spess Marine chapter does?" Well you'd be right, but unlike other chapters that are [[Raven Guard|lazy emos]] or [[Space Wolves|closet furfags]] these marines get shit done and they do this by zerg rushing their enemies with a hundred or more heavily power armored superhumans holding power weapons and screaming a litany of curses. They generally fly around on their battle barges [[Exterminatus|exterimatusing]] planets the [[Inquisition]] is to lazy fuck with itself or starting crusades against xenos [[Eldar|faggots]]. Also unlike other Chapters, they don't have scout teams as they think they're not righteously angry enough. Instead: All new recruits are given about the same gear as a typical Battle Brother and schooled in the field by a fully appointed Marine. | |||
The Black Templars is the largest loyalist chapter with 3,000-10,000 Catholic Space Nazis in its ranks, this is primarily because they're scattered through out the galaxy so their approximate number is unknown. This means that their chapter alone could wipe out the [[Tau|weeaboo communists]] if they were drawn together in one place. Of course this would twist the nipples of the Inquistion and move the setting of 40k along, so don't expect it to happen anytime soon(read: ever). Their rage does have the side effect of making then unwilling to fight beside psykers(and giving them the option to make any enemy a prefered enemy on the table top, which is fucking awesome), but screw that, they're so filled with rage that they charge forward when retreating and charge forward when they're FUCKING ANGRY. They are desended from the [[Imperial Fists]], but obviously got Dorn's most manly [[Gene Seed|spooge]]. They sometimes get to wear cool crusader helms, but they aren't quiet as [[Awesome|awesome]] as the beakies' corvus helms. | |||
Revision as of 04:51, 21 June 2010
 This page is in need of cleanup. Srsly. It's a fucking mess. |
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The Black Templars. These Spess Mahrehns. are as manly as the Manly Marines and as angry as the Angry Marines, infact these guys would probably be the GW Canon version of the Angry Marines.
About the Black Templars
Eather than express this fury through cursing, ordering 10,000 pizza to a rival chapter's fortess or simply pounding the shit out of their opponents using a variety of power weapons: they do so by burning heretic texts(as kindling for the actual heretics), pwning mutants and skull fucking aliens. But you say, "Isn't that what every other Spess Marine chapter does?" Well you'd be right, but unlike other chapters that are lazy emos or closet furfags these marines get shit done and they do this by zerg rushing their enemies with a hundred or more heavily power armored superhumans holding power weapons and screaming a litany of curses. They generally fly around on their battle barges exterimatusing planets the Inquisition is to lazy fuck with itself or starting crusades against xenos faggots. Also unlike other Chapters, they don't have scout teams as they think they're not righteously angry enough. Instead: All new recruits are given about the same gear as a typical Battle Brother and schooled in the field by a fully appointed Marine.
The Black Templars is the largest loyalist chapter with 3,000-10,000 Catholic Space Nazis in its ranks, this is primarily because they're scattered through out the galaxy so their approximate number is unknown. This means that their chapter alone could wipe out the weeaboo communists if they were drawn together in one place. Of course this would twist the nipples of the Inquistion and move the setting of 40k along, so don't expect it to happen anytime soon(read: ever). Their rage does have the side effect of making then unwilling to fight beside psykers(and giving them the option to make any enemy a prefered enemy on the table top, which is fucking awesome), but screw that, they're so filled with rage that they charge forward when retreating and charge forward when they're FUCKING ANGRY. They are desended from the Imperial Fists, but obviously got Dorn's most manly spooge. They sometimes get to wear cool crusader helms, but they aren't quiet as awesome as the beakies' corvus helms.
Their accomplishments include:
Taking back a hundred planets that were stolen by the blue space socialists after the Smurfs ran home like little babies to deal with a single hive fleet(Which cost them their entire 1st company).
Launching a 10,000 year crusade as part of their deal during the second founding.
Killing an alien pysker and accidently blowing out ten billion astropaths in the process, oops.