Arseplomancer

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Revision as of 03:35, 21 October 2016 by 83.47.105.106 (talk) (→The Set Up)
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Dungeons and Dragons 3.X has some pretty crazy builds if you dig into the right sourcebooks (and in some cases, dragon magazines). Obviously this build isn't as powerful as the omnipotent Pun-Pun, and it might not even be finished on paper. Yet it is perhaps even more lulzy. The idea is to have the character to use the escape artist skill to murder a man (or any sufficiently large foe with an anus really) in a spectacular fashion, primarily by crawling into a victim's digestive tract via his/her anus, resulting in not only the victim exploding, but onlookers becoming fanatical followers at the wondrous display. We almost wish we were joking.

Ways to improve your bonus to escape artist checks

  • High dexterity is good.
  • Dumping EVERY SINGLE POINT INTO THE SKILL that you can (Your maximum rank in a class skill is your character level + 3. Your maximum rank in a cross-class skill is one-half of this number (do not round up or down)).
  • The Exemplar prestige class also gives a lot of skill bonuses.
  • Perhaps some levels in Rogue.
  • Feats
    • Agile
    • Skill Focus (escape artist)
  • Magic items that boost it and/or enhance other boosts on it or Dex.
    • Vest of Escape.
    • Manual of Quickness of Action
    • Gloves of Dexterity
  • The spell, Shadow Form (from Complete Adventure), which not only enhances Escape Artist checks but makes any attempt to leap into a man's innards from the outside even easier.

Ways to add to the FUN

  • The Complete Adventurer says you can cut the time of an escape artist attempt in half at the cost of increasing the DC by 10

No Fun Allowed

  • As said before, this requires a generous interpretation of the Persuasive Performance class feature, specifically what constitutes as "non-threatening" (remember, crawling into someone's anus, if you have access to growing, allows you to slay him or her, and even you didn't have that ability, it might look painful for the victim). One could make the case that "non-threatening" might require you to already be on neutral (or perhaps positive) terms with the observer AND for the observer to be on such terms with the victim that they either don't care if the victim is injured or killed, or perhaps even want the victim injured or killed. And of course it is possible to view the "non-threatening" requirement in an even more restrictive light than that.

Outside Links

See Alsos

Anal Circumference

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