Zeus: Difference between revisions
No edit summary |
m (12 revisions imported) |
||
(6 intermediate revisions by 5 users not shown) | |||
Line 13: | Line 13: | ||
|Favoured Weapon = Shortspear or halfspear | |Favoured Weapon = Shortspear or halfspear | ||
}} | }} | ||
'''Zeus''' is the king of the Greco-Roman gods, lord of storms and patron of kings, renowned for his wisdom, his battle prowess, and his [[/d/|unflincing dedication to sticking his dick in everything that catches his eye]]. Even moreso than the average member of the Greek pantheon, he tends to treat everyone else quite poorly and is a serial rapist, making 3e trying to sweep that under the rug by giving him a good alignment serious [[Fail]]. His bastard son [[Heracles]] ([[Hercules]] to the Romans) is likely the single most famous mythical demi-god. | '''Zeus''' is the king of the Greco-Roman gods, lord of storms and patron of kings, renowned for his wisdom, his battle prowess, and his [[/d/|unflincing dedication to sticking his dick in everything that catches his eye]]. Even moreso than the average member of the Greek pantheon, he tends to treat everyone else quite poorly and is even by the standard's of the bronze age: a serial rapist, making 3e trying to sweep that under the rug by giving him a good alignment serious [[Fail]]. His bastard son [[Heracles]] ([[Hercules]] to the Romans) is likely the single most famous mythical demi-god. | ||
He once impregnated a sworn virgin companion of his daughter [[Artemis]], Callisto...while appearing to Callisto as Artemis. Seriously. Callisto actually thought it was Artemis the entire time too up until her pregnancy was noticed. We don't know that worked out exactly logistically, so we can only assume he turned himself into a [[dickgirl]] during that time (and we can ''definitely'' assume the sex ed Callisto had received was lacking). | |||
For all his exceptional dickery however, Zeus is also known as multiple positive aspects: Among others, he is the God of Sacred Hospitality, the God of Trade, the God of Weather (and as such the bringer or ender of droughts through his power over rain) and the God of Oaths. As such, fucking with the ritual of hospitality, harming a guest or harming your host, is liable to bring the burning hate of Zeus on you, as is attempting to swindle someone as a trader, and proven liars and oathbreakers were (in Ancient Greece) required to commission a votive statue to Zeus as part of their punishments. This is also considered a part as to why the Trojan War occurred (rather then the [[Derp|seemingly ridiculous concept that all of Greece would attack a city just because a king's wife left him]]) since Paris took away Helen while he was a guest at Sparta, so the Greeks failing to punish this abuse of hospitality would be ignoring an offense to Zeus himself. | |||
He is most relevant to /tg/ for appearing in [[Advanced Dungeons & Dragons]] and in [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition]] as part of the Olympian pantheon to be worshipped by player character and NPCs. As such, he appears as part of the [[Great Wheel]] and is an important NPC in [[Planescape]]. | He is most relevant to /tg/ for appearing in [[Advanced Dungeons & Dragons]] and in [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition]] as part of the Olympian pantheon to be worshipped by player character and NPCs. As such, he appears as part of the [[Great Wheel]] and is an important NPC in [[Planescape]]. |
Latest revision as of 21:52, 23 June 2023
Zeus | ||
---|---|---|
Aliases | Father of Gods and Mortals, the Thunderer | |
Alignment | 2E/5E: True Neutral 3E: Chaotic Good |
|
Divine Rank | Greater God | |
Pantheon | Greek | |
Portfolio | Storms, Rulership | |
Domains | 3E: Air, Chaos, Good, Nobility, Strength, Weather 5E: Tempest |
|
Home Plane | Olympus (Arborea) | |
Worshippers | Everyone | |
Favoured Weapon | Shortspear or halfspear |
Zeus is the king of the Greco-Roman gods, lord of storms and patron of kings, renowned for his wisdom, his battle prowess, and his unflincing dedication to sticking his dick in everything that catches his eye. Even moreso than the average member of the Greek pantheon, he tends to treat everyone else quite poorly and is even by the standard's of the bronze age: a serial rapist, making 3e trying to sweep that under the rug by giving him a good alignment serious Fail. His bastard son Heracles (Hercules to the Romans) is likely the single most famous mythical demi-god.
He once impregnated a sworn virgin companion of his daughter Artemis, Callisto...while appearing to Callisto as Artemis. Seriously. Callisto actually thought it was Artemis the entire time too up until her pregnancy was noticed. We don't know that worked out exactly logistically, so we can only assume he turned himself into a dickgirl during that time (and we can definitely assume the sex ed Callisto had received was lacking).
For all his exceptional dickery however, Zeus is also known as multiple positive aspects: Among others, he is the God of Sacred Hospitality, the God of Trade, the God of Weather (and as such the bringer or ender of droughts through his power over rain) and the God of Oaths. As such, fucking with the ritual of hospitality, harming a guest or harming your host, is liable to bring the burning hate of Zeus on you, as is attempting to swindle someone as a trader, and proven liars and oathbreakers were (in Ancient Greece) required to commission a votive statue to Zeus as part of their punishments. This is also considered a part as to why the Trojan War occurred (rather then the seemingly ridiculous concept that all of Greece would attack a city just because a king's wife left him) since Paris took away Helen while he was a guest at Sparta, so the Greeks failing to punish this abuse of hospitality would be ignoring an offense to Zeus himself.
He is most relevant to /tg/ for appearing in Advanced Dungeons & Dragons and in Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition as part of the Olympian pantheon to be worshipped by player character and NPCs. As such, he appears as part of the Great Wheel and is an important NPC in Planescape.