Gor (John Norman)

This article or section is about something involving/related to /d/. Expect PROMOTIONS and possible mental scarring. Also rape.

Gor is John Norman's magical realm.... what, you want more than that? Okay, we warned you. Not to be confused with the Gor breed of Beastmen.

The Gor novels are a series of Science Fantasy novels written by John Norman as a pastiche of the John Carter of Mars stories written by Edgar Rice Burroughs. They are set on the world of Gor, a "Counter-Earth" style hidden tenth planet - meaning it occupies the "circle" from the sun as Earth, but sits on the direct opposite side of the sun at all times, preventing either from being able to see the other.

Note that this actually impossible in astrodynamics, as no less than Joseph-Louis Lagrange could have told Professor Norman over a century before (STL3, if you care to look it up). Dr Norman did work the explanation into his world building, though.

You see, Gor is an artificial planet created by a bunch of sexless insectoid aliens known only as "The Priest-Kings", who have been populating it with populations of humans stolen from Earth pretty much throughout human history. They also place some very strict limits on technology, mostly that relating to weaponry, so you have a world in which life-extending elixir is being produced and consumed casually by a bunch of savages who haven't even figured out windmills, sails or clockwork, where armour is illegal and armaments extend no further than swords, bows and arrows - prospective gun designers get assassinated by the Priest Kings. The larger scope of the story is more or less some kind of war against large creatures called Kur who are similar to werewolves, waged by the Priest Kings. So the Priest Kings take the manliest men and most feminine women and breed a master race on a medieval planet for super soldiers(at least they aren't racist, black men and women are taken too). While they themselves have technology rivalling the Dark Age of Technology.

Tarnsman of Gor starts the series innocuously-enough: the hero Tarl Cabot, Norman's self-insert as a university professor, somehow gets translated over there and then has to deal with this cruel and slave-owning society, where men are exulted as warriors (or damned to a short, brutal life as labor-slaves) who reign over harems of women indoctrinated to serve as sex slaves. So far, so the gritter parts of - say - the Hyborian Age; that's standard. As we go along, we learn the women are being brainwashed through the power of rape, and non-slave women, technically "free" ladies who wear Niqab style clothes and are frigid hags whose true feminine powers awaken upon enslavement and rape, and yearn to be slaves. And eventually we just have to accept that Norman likes it here.

And so do Norman's fans. There's actually a community of bondage-and-submission devotees who see this shit as near-Scripture and consist half of Second Life medieval adult action sims. The hell, man.

The Priest Kings Golden Beetle made it to Fiend Factory in White Dwarf 49, so Gor (regrettably) has been /tg/-relevant for some decades now. Dragon Magazine even gave Cabot stats, in the "Giants of the Earth" line (#61): Human Fighter 20. And since 2017 there is a RPG.

You might be thinking that we're exaggerating the creepiness of this setting. After all, things have changed since the 70s, when this debuted. But even during the 70s, people became increasingly prone to going "dude, what the fuck?" as the novels progressed. Even his appearance in Dragon Magazine made some note of this, describing him as Lawful Evil in alignment and noting he used to be Lawful Good, but he went full misogynist after being captured and forced to be a slave to a Gorean tribeswoman called Telima, which exacerbated a loathing of women he'd developed as a child being raised by an unpleasant aunt, so now he has the same "women belong in the harem pleasuring me" attitude as any native Gorean. It even went so far as to give him these "charming mechanics...

Because of Tarl Cabot’s prejudices, female player characters must tread very lightly in his presence. Tarl’s reaction (see page 63 of the Dungeon Masters Guide) is checked initially, and again later if modifying factors come to play. Subtract 10 from Tarl’s reaction toward any woman encountered or singly in a group; subtract 10 more if the woman affects “male” prerogatives (e.g., adventuring, warfare, combat); subtract 10 more if a woman is rude or unpleasant to Tarl or his friends, and 10 more if a woman is from Earth (these types particularly irritate him). If Tarl’s reaction to a woman (with modifiers) is 25 or less, he will decide to abduct the woman (at the first possible opportunity) 40% of the time. To girls he enthralls, Tarl is stern and domineering, but he has never slain a woman. Gorean slave girls are drilled in the arts of the dance, the harem, cooking, sewing and cleaning. His caveman approach has proven very effective, and the female prisoner must save, as against a Charm spell, or fall madly in love with him.

Fun fact: a fan submitted a letter to Dragon #63 complaining about Tarl being given the Lawful Evil alignment. In Dragon #66, the author of Tarl's entry in Giants in the Earth posted their nearly page-long rebuttal, which ultimately could have been boiled down to "because he's a slaver who drags women from their home and rapes them until they are too mindbroken to do anything but serve him, you fucking idiot".

Houseplants of Gor

An old parody of John Norman's absolutely cringy writing style that circled its way around the internet. In summary, 12-year-old kids with non-native English skills can write better fiction.

The spider plant cringed as its owner brought forth the watering can. "I am a spider plant!" it cried indignantly. "How dare you water me before my time! Guards!" it called. "Guards!"

Borin, its owner, placed the watering can on the table and looked at it. "You will be watered," he said.

"You do not dare to water me!" laughed the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

"Do not water me!" wept the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

I watched this exchange. Truly, I believed the plant would be watered. It was plant, and on Gor it had no rights. Perhaps on Earth, in its permissive society, which distorts the true roles of all beings, which forces both plant and waterer to go unhappy and constrained, which forbids the fulfillment of owner and houseplant, such might not happen. Perhaps there, it would not be watered. But it was on Gor now, and would undoubtedly feel its true place, that of houseplant. It was plant. It would be watered at will. Such is the way with plants.

Borin picked up the watering can, and muchly watered the plant. The plant cried out. "No, Master! Do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. "Please, Master," begged the plant, "do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. It was plant. It could be watered at will.

The plant sobbed muchly as Borin laid down the watering can. It was not pleased. Too, it was wet. But this did not matter. It was plant.

"You have been well watered," said Borin.

"Yes," said the plant, "I have been well watered." Of course, it could be watered by its master at will.

"I have watered you well," said Borin.

"Yes, master," said the plant. "You have watered your plant well. I am plant, and as such I should be watered by my master."

The cactus plant next to the spider plant shuddered. It attempted to cover its small form with its small arms and small needles. "I am plant," it said wonderingly. "I am of Earth, but for the first time, I feel myself truly plantlike. On Earth, I was able to control my watering. I often scorned those who would water me. But they were weak, and did not see my scorn for what it was, the weak attempt of a small plant to protect itself. Not one of the weak Earth waterers would dare to water a plant if it did not wish it. But on Gor," it shuddered, "on Gor it is different. Here, those who wish to water will water their plants as they wish. But strangely, I feel myself most plantlike when I am at the mercy of a strong Gorean master, who may water me as he pleases."

"I will now water you," said Borin, the cactus's Gorean master.

The cactus did not resist being watered. Perhaps it was realizing that such watering was its master's to control. Too, perhaps it knew that this master was far superior to those of Earth, who would not water it if it did not wish to be watered.

The cactus's watering had been finished. The spider plant looked at it.

"I have been well watered," it said.

"I, too, have been well watered," said the cactus.

"My master has watered me well," said the spider plant.

"My master, too, has watered me well," said the cactus.

"I am to be placed in a hanging basket on the porch," said the spider plant.

"I, too, am to be placed in a hnaging basket on the porch," said the cactus.

"I wish you well," said the spider plant.

"I, too, wish you well," said the cactus.

"Tal," said the spider plant.

"Tal, too," said the cactus.

I did not think that the spider plant would object to being watered by its master again. For it realized that it was plant, and that here, unlike on Earth, it was likely to be owned and watered by many masters.