Editing Codex - Angry Custodes (section)

===Angry Titans, Prophetic Profanity and Profanitically Prophetic===
To date, the Angry Custodes only possess two titans, the two warhound class titans which were guarding the emperors throne room during The Great Fuckening. This violent, procession of profuse profanity not only made the titans beacons of psychic energy, but also gave them true sentience, if you can call wanting to crush all the heretics into pulp an intelligence (and ironic considering that artificial intelligence is one of the most heretical things according to the Imperium). The Angry Custodes don't mind this however, partly due to the the sheer amounts of butt hurt one of these titans could put out, but mostly because they only found out that the two titans were sentient once they'd been put aboard one of the Angry Marine ships and opened up to find that the titans crew were all dead from "first degree profanity burns". 

Since then however, the two titans (who now go by the names of Prophetic Profanity and Profanitically Prophetic (although the orks see them as "da humies givin praise to da orkiest of da gods, Gork and Mork", to the point that the two titans will also accept being called Gork and Mork/Mork and Gork)) only occasionally kill their crew members, with the only people inside them they won't kill are Mind Fucked Psykers and Sisters of RAEG, the former because the titans really enjoy how the psykers just huddle up in a corner of their crew sections and cry, and the latter because Sisters of RAEG are the only people angrier than an Angry Titan. During transportation of an Angry Titan, the Sisters of RAEG actually take up residence inside it for the duration of the trip, as the two groups each find the sheer RAEG of the other rather calming, allowing the two to rest, catch up on some reading, maintain their weapons and preparing for the time when they must be ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LIVID WITH ALL OF YOU COCK SUCKING HERETICS AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! The added bonus of this is that the Sisters of RAEG are as far away from everyone else as possible, as even Angry Custodians find Sisters of RAEG unnerving.

Prophetic Profanity and Profanitically Prophetic are two separate models which can be fielded separately or together. Prophetic Profanity is equipped with two Archeotech Mega Bolters, while Profanitically Prophetic is equipped with two Archeotech Titan Chainfists. Both titans can also step on their puny foes with their Golden Titanic Feet.
{| border=1 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=4 align=left
|- valign=top
! Name !! M !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! A !! Ld !! Sv !! Points
|-
| Angry Titan || * || * || * || 11 || 9 || 35 || 5 || 8 || 2+ || 2200
|}
<br style="clear: both; height: 0px;" /><br>
{| border=1 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=4 align=right
|- valign=top
! Remaining W !! M !! WS !! BS !! Void Shield 
|-
| 23-35+ || 24" || 3+ || 2+ || 4+ 
|-
| 16-22 || 18" || 3+ || 3+ || 4+ 
|-
| 9-15 || 12" || 4+ || 4+ || 5+ 
|-
| 1-8 || 2D6" || 4+ || 4+ || 6+ 
|}

Wargear:
*Prophetic Profanity and/or Profanitically Prophetic may carry a single Mind Fucked Psyker for 300 points. If it/they do so then they may manifest one power per turn from the Titanicus Fuckious discipline per turn (see Titanicus Fuckious for more details).

<br style="clear: both; height: 0px;" /><br>
{| border=1 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=4 align=right
|- valign=top
! Melee Weapon !! Range !! Type !! S !! AP !! D !! Abilities !! Points
Per Weapon
|-
| Archeotech Mega Bolters || 72” || Heavy 20 || 6 || -3 || 2 || Units targeted by this weapon suffer a -1 to their invulnerability saves A model armed with two of these weapons may re-roll failed hit rolls of 1 against TITANIC, VEHICLE and MONSTER units.. || Pair 200
|-
| Archeotech Titan Chainfist || Melee || Melee || x2 || -4 || 6 || If a '''VEHICLE''' or '''Monster''' is slain by this weapon, pick an enemy unit within 9" of the bearer and roll a D6. On a 4+ that unit suffers D3 mortal wounds. A model armed with two of these weapons may add 1 to its attack characteristic and may make an additional attack with this weapon during the fight phase. || Pair 100
|-
| Golden Titanic Feet || Melee || Melee || User || -3 || D3 || Make 3 hit rolls for each attack made with this weapon, instead of 1. || 0
|}

Abilities:
*SUPERHEAVY AS FUCK BITCHES

*NA NA NA NA NA THIS OBJECTIVE IS MINE YOU PUNY GUARDSMEN!!!

*LOOK, I’M DRIVING WITHOUT A PILOT!!!

*Titan Void shields

*Cataclysmic Explosion

*The lure of pure fury:
**All other units within 12” add 1 to their attack characteristic and subtract 2 from their leadership characteristic, unless they have the '''ANGRY CUSTODES''' keyword, in which case they only subtract 1.

*Hiding place for Sisters of RAEG:
**This model may transport up to 20 SISTERS OF RAEG models and 1 SISTER SUPERIOR. 10 models being transported inside this model may fire their weapons while being transported during the shooting phase.

[[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Awesome]][[Category:Stories]][[Category:Stories/Warhammer 40,000]] [[Category:Warhammer Homebrew]][[Category:/tg/ 40,000]]