Editing Farsqueaker

A new device that has enabled the bitterly backstabbing race of [[Skaven]] in [[Warhammer Fantasy]] and [[Age of Sigmar]] to communicate across long distances. The Farsqueaker is a creation of [[Clan Skryre]] which is, rather than a self-destructing Gatling gun or flamethrower, an invasive device that functions as a telephone. 

==The Pitch==
"Do you want to order pestilens' new Tilean-flavoured pizza without getting killed by Rat-hounds on the way?"
"With the FARSQUEAKER you can!*"

"Want to know who your traitorous spies are spying on without getting too close to the spies that are obviously after your tail-tail?"
"Get a FARSQUEAKER!*"

"Want to reserve a place at the beautiful ass-ass of your local Breeder without waiting in line like a slave while Blackrats laugh-laugh at you?"
"Do it with the FARSQUEAKER!*"

"Are you a rich-rich Skaven? Of course you aren't, and that's why we of the greatest clan, Clan Skryre of course, made this portent of technology refined for our customers different needs-needs. You don't have two whole ears after all, remember? You're poor! So why pay for both when we can offer at 1.5 slave tokens more-more our special 1 1/2 device for your whole and half-chewed ears? You'll be the most spiffy-spiffy Clanrat in your tunnel!"

"Remember to scratch a line on our tunnel-channel: skryrules.dig."

*Results may vary. If your remaining ear gets big and rots away while using this device, blame [[Clan Moulder]]! It's totally those guys' fault-fault!

==Controversy==
>"hey, tokens' stealer-thief! This squeaker doesn't work!"

>"of course it doesn't, silly-customer, you forgot to buy the batteries"

>puts two green-coloured rocks inside the squeaker (actually a rat with a helmet on its head and a broken antenna on its tail) and wakes(turn on) the device 

>"see it works now! Listen"

>fake a call and gives the squeaker back

>"it's 2 tokens for tech support" 

>"t-thanks skryre"

>clan skryre: we don't know how it works but we'll always* work it for you

==Equivalents==
For some reason the [[Lizardmen]] had one, which was stolen by the [[Skaven]] and then they contacted the [[Eldar]] with it. They were of course absolutely terrified by it, and decided to blow the whole city up to get rid of it.

[[Category: Warhammer Fantasy]] [[Category: Skaven]]