Stercus Ludicrum

Brigitte Returns

The concept: On a backwater shithole of a ice planet, a governor's son's desire to tinker with sleeping Necrons leads to everyone in the galaxy fighting everyone else over a planet with no strategic value for no reason. And it is AWESOME Characters

Active Characters

This section includes any and all characters who are currently still alive and present in the game.

Imperium

Imperial Guard

• Original Commissar The original Commissar who started it all (always a Commissar). Is currently the closest thing that the local PDF on Cold Shoulder, has a a capable leader.

• Future Commissar The same guy as before, but from a far shittier future that occurs a year and a half after the war of Cold Shoulder originally started. We don't understand how he got here, or why he's still here, so stop fucking asking, and get back to work!

• Colonel James Arthur Praetorian Guard Colonel, was told by his higher ups to move as many conscripts as he had on hand to Stercus Ludicrum. Hasn't done much but walk around and wonder who is mad enough to have this many troops on one planet, also kinda thinks some of the sisters of battle hate him. Has a nice mustache though. Seems to always be in the wrong place at the right time

Ecclesiarchy

• Ecclesiarchy Youngster Bishop A rather young bishop, elevated to his position due to him having an Aquila birthmark. During the first clusterfuck war, he united the civilians of the planet into a holy mob. Managed to convert the Governor's Whore of a Daughter away from Slaanesh worship and to that of the Emperor. Is now married to her.

• Governor's whore of a Daughter(call her Steph) The daughter of the recently deceased planetary Governor, and a former Slanneshi cultist like her mother. Went to "rehab" and got better (and by that, we mean she got married to the planetary bishop, and enjoyed the taste of his dick, and so got her act together). Is currently the the planetary Governess.

• Dietrich Wegstein

Sisters of Battle

• Canoness Konstanzia Canoness of the Order of the Ermine Mantle, and "leader" of the local sisters of battle currently on planet. Has bionic eyes, and a penchant for drinking far too fucking much expensive alcohol. We've tried talking to her about it, but it usually ends with a serious beating.

• Living Saint Brigitte Formerly Sister Brigitte of the Order of the Ermine Mantle, Brigitte died and returned as a living saint. Is unbelievably humble and a little thick. Tends to die a lot.

• Sister Charlotte - Dominion serving Konstanzia.

• Sister Lydia Drives a repressor for the Canoness with her gunner, Sister Hanna.

• Sister Terese - Seraphim serving Konstanzia.

• Sister Olga A sister of battle with the Ermine Mantle. One of their heavy weapons specialist's armed with a heavy bolter. Her fellow sisters all say she eats too much, and think she's massively overweight. She only eats as much as she does, because she burns more calories than the rest of her sisters, due to lugging around a 50 pound gun, and it's ammunition. Is currently in a relationship with a certain Primaris space marine.

• Palatine Barbastella

• Palatine Sara

• Sister Nyx

• Sister Maria

Space Marines

• Primaris Sergeant Jaren Artorius A Primaris space marine, belonging to the Broken Shields chapter of space marines. His squad dropped into orbit with orders to take down a titan, but ended up swallowed by it, and ending up in the Warp. After an intense journey with an insane version of Kaldor Draigo, he and his squad managed to escape, and make their way back to cold shoulder, before continuing to assist with planetary defense. It was during this time, that he met and started a relationship with a member of the Ermine Mantle chapter of sisters of battle, by the name of Olga.

• Captain Marek Avalon

• Captain Thorn

Rogue Trader

• Rogue Trader Corazon III

Mechanicus

• Juris Magos Anthony Cosanostro

• Vusio

Civilians

• Oswald "the última luz" Helldreks

Xenos

Dark Eldar

• Sybarite Drazar A warrior of the Starless Night Kabal who can't seem to catch a break. Spends a lot of time running away from things. Is the love interest for a Succubus by the name Ann'Ette, however he is unaware of this and thinks she wants to kill him. Likes to loot bodies and has caches of weapons and armor all over the place. Slowly but surely rising through the ranks of his Kabal.
• Succubus Ann'Ette A Dark Eldar Succubus. Currently chasing her love interest, Sybarite Drazar across the planet. Thinks he is just playing games with her and can't possibly be so dense to think she's trying to kill him. Got her crush on Drazar after he (accidentally) saved her from a grenade by falling on it. Called in a favor with a Haemonculus to stitch him back together.

• Archon Dathram

Orks

• Kommando Gor'Muncha

• Warboss 'Ead-Krumpa

• Weird-Dok Gutpoker

Eldar

• Hast'El'Vishkaya On the planet to recover the souls stones of the dead eldar, very stuck up (like all eldar) and full of himself. Also likes spouting Elvis puns.
• Prys'Ellia El'Vish's companion, and wraithlord. Died on the planet some time ago and came back for round 2.

Tyranids

• Genestealer Patriarch A genestealer who began the construction of a cult after all the battles settled down. It got big impossibly fast, due to warp fuckery likely the same as created Future Commissar. Slain in battle, and currently enshrined within the Cathedral of The Four Armed Emperor.

• Sister Cecilia A former Sister of Battle, she was infected by the genestealer patriarch, and got REALLY into worshipping the Four Armed Emperor. She now leads the genestealer cult ground forces

• Norn Queen Becky - The insidious Norn Queen burrowed beneath the planet, plotting her revenge on everyone else.

Necrons

• Menkaukht

Tau

• Shas'Vre Tash'var Dorax

Chaos

Traitor Marines

• Hakron Geras Alpha Legion Operator-Master and current second in command to the Harrow-Master of Cell ΨO

• Headhunter Killteam λ The Alpha Legion Headhunters of Cell ΨO, lead by the Headhunter Prime Tylax

• Nerus Alpha Legion Apothecary of Cell ΨO

• Mefros Alpha Legion Infiltraitor of Cell ΨO

• Various unimportant squads of Legionnaires

• Sorcerer Xerxes

• Tar Gwill

The Lost and The Damned

• Drathor

• Medeth Absinthium

• Julius

Thread 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/58335731/

Thread 2: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/58415703/

Thread 3: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/58537811/