Titan (Warhammer 40,000)
A Titan is a general term used by the Imperium for all things that are ridiculously MASSIVE and carry HUGE FUCKING RAPE GUNS that can blow the fuck out off the opposing side. The bigger ones are somewhat humanoid.
Most races own a titan of some sort, except for the Tau because they're too busy fapping and watching anime to build one, though they use a somewhat large starship to supplement their needs. Each race's Titans reflect the design philosophy behind the rest of their armies. So Imperial Titans are halfway between Spartan minimalism and Gothic shit everywhere, Chaos Titans look like pure evil, Ork Titans are cobbled together out of odds and ends, Tyranid Titans are Mothra and Eldar Titans are gay.
Basically whoever has more Titans gets instant win.
Imperial Titans
The Imperium has quite a variety of titans under the control of Adeptus Titanicus, each has a name and not one is the same as the other. They are quite often referred to as god machines due to their ability to blow the fucking shit out of anything in their way. They are so fucking huge that infantry can't do anything to them with their tiny ass guns. These titans can unleash unlimited amounts of RAPE via their MASSIVE FUCKING GUNS that are mounted on their arms and sometimes on their shoulders. Well actually there are guns fucking EVERYWHERE on a titan so when you see one you are quite fucked. Also they have void shields which makes them pretty much invulnerable to whatever shit you can throw at it.
Warhound Titan:
The smallest Titan class the Imperium has but it's still fucking massive. It looks like a dinosaur with no tail.
It carries smaller weapons such as a massive megabolter which is like a minigun that fires off tank shells, or a Huge ass LAZAR that rips your tanks a new one like they were made of cardboard. Or maybe throw a really big flamethrower on it.
Reaver Titan Bigger than the Warhound so therefore causes more RAPE, this titan can wield an absolutely HUGE powerfist for fucking Wraithlords, Defilers, etc. It can also carry a massive hellfire missile launcher for more rape or triple lehzar rape cannons and even a fucking Gatling Rape Blaster.
Warlord Titan It's really REALLY fucking big, one of the more common huge fucking titans that carry all the weapons you can imagine from megabolters to huge lazer and devastator cannons that should've been mounted on some kind of fucking battleship. The Imperium seems to have almost as many of these as it has Reavers. Modified or custom built titans are known to exist such as the ANGRY MARINE TITAN with its HUGE chain fist, even moar massive Chain fist, oh and it launches Angry Marines and Land Raiders, fucking awesome rite?
Imperator Titan HOLY SHIT IT WEARS CASTLES!!! Over 9000 times bigger and heavier than a Warlord Titan and too many massive fucking guns to count. It needs a whole ship to itself to get it around. Unfortunately the Imperium doesn't have a lot of 'em anymore since those chaos assholes stole the majority of 'em (they still suck though). They said that it's the largest thing to walk on land, because anything larger would produce its own gravity well.
Apocalypse Titan Not unheard of, according to Lexicanum.
Orky Titans
The Orks use titans called Gargants, made out of scrap metal, wood, stolen stuff, and SHEER ORKINESS. They are supposedly effigies of the ork gods, but sometimes they just woant a bigger, killier thing than that other ork over there. Obvously, the Orks have no standard pattern of build, but Gargants are almost always humanoid, wield over-sized guns, have a huge close combat weapon, and are insanely hard to take down (even compared to the other races' Titans!). The bigger ones usually move on treads, the smaller ones usually waddle. They have Power Fields, which are so finicky that they can't be repaired in battle, which sucks, but at least they have them.
Stompa: The smallest Gargant type. While Games Workshop would like you to think otherwise, the Stompa bigger than a Mega-Dred but smaller than the current model, which is a small Gargant (don't get all smart and technical, we know the irony there). They come in bunches, and have no shields whatsoever. Their main armament is usually a gattling gun or stolen tank cannon, and then a giant close combat weapon. They eat infantry, buildings, smaller Titans, and tanks for breakfast, but only in close combat.
Gargant:
Unfortunately fielding a titan in a tabletop game will cause lots of RAGE and presents itself as a huge fire-magnet so every fucking thing on the other side will try to shoot at it. Luckily its got shields so it can soak up a lot of damage. Should said titan 'get killed' it may take out the whole field if its a small one, and all those units around it, enhancing its awesomeness. Too bad that since you are forced to buy one from Forge World, eveyone who sees yo with on will call you a rich noob who buys his way to victory. AND, you have to play Apocalypse, which SUCKS. But who cares? YOU HAVE A GIANT RAPE MACHINE OF DEATH!!!!!
Gallery
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Chaos is fucked. -
In Soviet Russia, Titan remembers you! -
In times like these, one does not need Dakka to radiate awesomeness. -
Dakka still helps though... -
SUCk IIIIIIIIT!
