Malefactor: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:338574-Armorcast, Catalog, Malefactor, Resin, Tyranids, Warhammer 40,000.jpg|thumb| | [[Image:Armorcast Malefactor3.jpeg|300px|thumb|right|What a modern Malefactor looks like. Still not very good...]] | ||
[[Image:DSC08549.jpg|300px|thumb|left|Untainted beauty. gaze upon its magnificence.]] | |||
[[Image:338574-Armorcast, Catalog, Malefactor, Resin, Tyranids, Warhammer 40,000.jpg|300px|thumb|left|The malefactor badly photo-edited into its ideal habitat: a non-existent one.]] | |||
'''Malefactors''' were a form of archaic [[Tyranid]] transport organism hailing from that race's great and carefree youth, when their conquest of the 2nd-edition galaxy relied on a heinous ocular assault with painfully distorted shapes and completely perverse color schemes. The Malefactor itself relied on the spectacle of its insane nose/dong protuberance to confuse and amaze its opponents, holding aloft and displaying its great flabby shepherd's-crook arms to intensify the enemy's stunned disbelief. The creature was presumably then able to slide past its dumbfounded, vomiting, and/or hysterically laughing enemies to safely reach its target deployment zone. | '''Malefactors''' were a form of archaic [[Tyranid]] transport organism hailing from that race's great and carefree youth, when their conquest of the 2nd-edition galaxy relied on a heinous ocular assault with painfully distorted shapes and completely perverse color schemes. The Malefactor itself relied on the spectacle of its insane nose/dong protuberance to confuse and amaze its opponents, holding aloft and displaying its great flabby shepherd's-crook arms to intensify the enemy's stunned disbelief. The creature was presumably then able to slide past its dumbfounded, vomiting, and/or hysterically laughing enemies to safely reach its target deployment zone. | ||
Revision as of 22:15, 27 October 2017
Malefactors were a form of archaic Tyranid transport organism hailing from that race's great and carefree youth, when their conquest of the 2nd-edition galaxy relied on a heinous ocular assault with painfully distorted shapes and completely perverse color schemes. The Malefactor itself relied on the spectacle of its insane nose/dong protuberance to confuse and amaze its opponents, holding aloft and displaying its great flabby shepherd's-crook arms to intensify the enemy's stunned disbelief. The creature was presumably then able to slide past its dumbfounded, vomiting, and/or hysterically laughing enemies to safely reach its target deployment zone.
This senseless eyesore of a Tyranid was designed to smuggle a nauseating quantity of its smaller brethren (old-fashioned Genestealers, Squats, Goblins a la Nilbog, etc.) into combat among the ill-favored folds of its hideousness. These would then be emitted via the Malefactor's transport sphincters (official term) in a totally indecent convulsion which would have made the universe itself twist to look the other way.