Marines Malevolent: Difference between revisions

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{{Infobox Spess Mahreen Chapter
{{Infobox Spess Mahreen Chapter

Revision as of 20:53, 2 January 2014

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This page is in need of cleanup. Srsly. It's a fucking mess.

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Asshole Marines
Founding Fourth or Eighth Founding
Successors of Possibly the World Eaters
Successor Chapters None
Chapter Master Unknown, maybe Assholetep
Primarch Unknown
Homeworld No idea, possibly Douchebag land
Strength Unknown, possibly declining (Thank God!)
Specialty Being absolute assholes, dickwards and douchebags, pissing off the Salamanders
Allegiance Imperium
Colours Piss Yellow and Black
Witness the very pinnacle of Douchebagery, the very yellow that reeks of scum PISS. They are every Salamanders nightmare, they are...the Marines Malevolent

The Marines Malevolent are a Space Marine Chapter in Warhammer 40,000. They have only have two real defining characteristics: they are complete assholes, and they hate (and are hated by) the Salamanders, which is probably related to the first point. It may also be related to their unique approach to hostage situations (hint: it involves Whirlwinds). They're such super massive assholes that, if their douchebaggery was a real and actual thing, it would collapse into a black hole and suck in the entire universe. They're pretty much the poster boys of everything bad about the Imperium rolled into one collection of chucklefucks.

They got a shortage of power armour, so they use whatever parts of power armour they can find. In the novel Salamander by Nick Kyme they even steal some from an abandoned Adeptus Mechanicus forge ship. They even blackmailed a First Founding Chapter Master to the point that he had to physically restrain himself from smacking the fuck out of the Malevolent representative. When the two met again at the end of the Third Armageddon campaign, said Chapter Master openly insulted the Malevolent Captain (after he beat the ever-living the fuck out of him in private) in front of the entire army, causing much sniggering amongst the nearer Guardsmen and earning the Chapter master (Tu'Shan) the title Hero of Armageddon.

Well OK, he got it for kicking Thracka's ass, but who cares.

Hence /tg/and GW writers regarding them as the worst chapter. Most chapters regard casualties, particularly those of the collateral nature, to be unfortunate but largely unavoidable. Yes, many civilians and Imperial Guardsmen died during the orks' assault on the hive, but had we not fought the xenos there many more would be dead.

A few Chapters (such as the Salamanders and the Space Wolves) go out of their way to minimalize casualties. Battle brothers,we few are all that stand between the heretics and the refugee camp behind us. The PDF and the Guard have not the men to spare to protect this place as they withdraw themselves. But curses upon ourselves and our Chapter if we allow that degenerate rabble to harm the Emperor's faithful!

But then there are the Marines Malevolent; their attitude is that the dead are worthy of contempt for they were too weak to live and if the wounded suffer then it is likewise because they are wretchedly weak. Help, Guardsman? No, you will only have my scorn.

In short in a galaxy of horror and tragedy, most suffer jadedly, a few grieve but only the Marines Malevolent jeer.... well, and the old Iron Hands, but that's basically retconned now.

Other forces in the Warhammer 40K universe may be EEEEEEVIL!!! on some sort of grand cosmic scale of grimdark, but very few are just nasty and petty and cruel in an all-too human way. They treat their Chapter Serfs like slaves for Emprah's sake! That's not grimdark, M&Ms, that's just... unpleasant.

They have only a few named characters, and only a few are alive at the time of the 'present day' in 40K. The only Malevolent known to be alive at the time of Medusa was Vinyar, a Company Captain with a raging grudge against Tu'Shan. They had no fewer than thirty three of their men (including a Veteran Sergeant, two Techmarines, a pilot, and a fucking APOTHECARY) get infected by the Obliterator Virus while they were boarding the ship Demetrion, so Vinyar basically told them to go hit themselves with Tu'Shan's Thunder Hammer until they were purified. We are not kidding.

We mean the literal Thunder Hammer you filthy perverts.

Gallery

Chapters of the Adeptus Astartes
First Founding
(M29)
Blood AngelsDark AngelsImperial FistsIron HandsRaven GuardSalamandersSpace WolvesUltramarinesWhite Scars
Second Founding
(021.M31)
Angels of AbsolutionAngels EncarmineAngels PorphyrAngels of RedemptionAngels SanguineAngels of VengeanceAngels VermillionAurora ChapterBlack ConsulsBlack GuardBlack TemplarsBlood DrinkersBrazen ClawsCrimson FistsDestroyersDoom EaglesEagle WarriorsExcoriatorsFists ExemplarFlesh TearersGenesis ChapterInceptorsIron SnakesLibatorsLions SableMaraudersMortifactorsNemesisNovamarinesObsidian GlaivesPatriarchs of UlixisPurple StarsPraetors of OrpheusRampagersRaptorsRed TalonsRevilersSilver EaglesSilver SkullsSoul DrinkersStorm LordsWhite ConsulsWolf Brothers
Third to
Twelfth Founding
(M32-M35)
Astral ClawsAngels PenitentAngels RevenantCharnel GuardDark PaladinsExecutionersFlesh EatersHalo BrethrenHowling GriffonsIron KnightsMantis WarriorsMarines MalevolentNight SwordsSable Swords (initial) - Scythes of the EmperorSpace SharksSons of Guilliman
Thirteenth Founding
(M35)
Death SpectresExorcists
Fourteenth to
Twentieth Founding
Angels of FireAvenging SonsCelebrants
Twenty-First Founding
(991.M35)
Black DragonsBlood GorgonsFire HawksFlame FalconsLamentersMinotaursSons of AntaeusTiger Claws
Twenty-Second to
Twenty-Sixth Founding
(M35-M41)
Angels of VigilanceAngels ExcelsisCelestial LionsDark HuntersDisciples of CalibanEmperor's SpearsFire AngelsGolden SonsHospitallersImperial HarbingersIron LordsKnights of the RavenMarines ErrantMentorsFire Claws/RelictorsStar PhantomsSubjugators
Ultima Founding
(999.M41/000.M42 to 012.M42)
Angels of DefianceBlack VipersBlades of VengeanceCastellans of the RiftCovenant of FireDark KrakensFulminatorsKnights CeruleanKnights of the ChaliceKnights of ThunderNecropolis HawksNemesorsPraetors of UltramarPrime AbsolversRift StalkersSilver DrakesSilver TemplarsSons of the PhoenixStorm ReapersUmbral KnightsUnnumbered SonsValiant BladesVoid TridentsWolfspear
Unknown Founding AbsolversAccipitersAdulatorsAngel GuardAngels EradicantAngels of RetributionAstral KnightsBlood RavensBlood SwordsBrazen DrakesBringers of JudgementBrothers PenitentCarmine BladesCowled WardensCrimson CastellansCrimson ConsulsCrimson ScythesDark HandsDark SonsDeath EaglesDoom WarriorsEmperor's ShadowsFire LordsGuardians of the CovenantGraven SpectresHammers of DornHarbingersHawk LordsInvadersIron CrusadersIron TalonsJade DragonsKnights of BloodKnights UnyieldingMarines ExemplarThe NamelessNight WatchRainbow WarriorsReclaimersRed HuntersRed ScorpionsRed SeraphsRed TemplarsRetributorsSable Swords (refounded) • Shadow WolvesSolar HawksSons of OrarStar DragonsStormwatchersStorm GiantsStorm WardensValedictorsViper LegionVorpal SwordsWhite TemplarsStorm Wings
Unsanctioned Founding Consecrators (founding unknown, but likely after 2nd Founding) • Sons of Medusa (separated from parent Chapters, ratified by edict) • Steel Confessors (de facto 22nd Founding, de jure ratified by edict) • Ashen Claws (separatist Raven Guard Legion exiles, nominal loyalists)
Others Astartes PraesesDeathwatchGrey KnightsJudgedLegion of the Damned